Warm House, Good Will

Welcome back readers! Today I am thrilled to be writing to you, as part of the RESQUED family, we are sure you will take part in understanding the love and warmth that family can bring to a foster child’s life or any other child’s. Before we delve into the importance of a warm and loving  home, we want to take a moment to express our deep gratitude to all the incredible foster carers and adopters out there. We are honoured to stand alongside you in this journey.

At this company, we, RESQUED, understand that peace and hope thrive in the embrace of a loving home. Just as our founder, Josh, found his sense of belonging through adoption, we believe that every child deserves the warmth, security and stability that a loving family can provide.

Today, I would like to guide your attention towards our desires, particularly our desire for peace. Peace only comes when you have more than hope, when you have assurance that life will be ‘okay.’ Home can be ninety percent of your peace, or ninety percent of your pain. For many children, there is no peace, not even hope.

The people you live with, the way they interact, the setting and place all contribute to whether you return home after social events, work or school with guaranteed peace or with fear that your environment is intruding on your very potential, your own hope that life might get better.  I have been extremely fortunate to be able to come home to a warm and loving family after school, and now university for my entire life. But, I understand that for many this would never seem possible in your own home.

Today we need to recognise, parents can provide a safe world that allows flourishing to take place for their foster child. If we don’t know how, we just need a glimpse of what it can look like, and that glimpse will never produce perfection, but it will produce progress.

Giving, not taking

Many people want to give in life: their talents, their observations, their discoveries, their gifts, their love. But, they don’t know how. They’re so afraid to give because these things are exploited, trapped, suppressed and abused by others throughout their life.

Giving is good, it’s generous and full of love and beauty. That is the very reason it can seem so rare. It is quickly taken and exploited, unnoticed, unappreciated. This discourages the giver to give. This is exactly why those who take, feel the need to take even more, they are starved because they teach those that give, that it is unrewarding to give, so they stop giving, and the cycle continues.

The world of fostering, as Josh has shown us, is difficult, slow and many times discouraging. But, the home can only be peaceful and steady if giving occurs. This lets the environment flourish and the love between each person thrive.

Giving is not complicated, it does not even need to be noticed straight away. Over the course of our lives we are most grateful when we look back at an event when someone was generous and patient to us, and we didn’t even notice. This builds thankfulness, it fuels us for the next day.

I am not just referring to material giving, but also psychological, spiritual, mental and familiar giving that stems from the heart.

Imagine what life at home could be. The warmth, friendship and peace we could feel if this happened. It is like a fireplace that provides warmth, fascination and safety from the cold outside.

Love that protects then motivates

Dear reader, we need to understand that love is doing what is best for someone you care about. This does not mean that you are doing what the other person wants you to do all the time, sometimes it is letting something difficult happen that is necessary for their thriving. But, don’t let that last sentence justify excessive harsh or cruel attitudes and actions. When I was younger, I hated the idea of playing in afterschool soccer, but my father patiently encouraged me to keep going, because he understood the benefits I would get from it: friends, another community and a new aspect of a healthy lifestyle in fitness. The love many people envision in our western world, is one that starves, it gives exactly what the other person wants, it is just passive, without effort, it does not have the other person’s future or wellbeing in mind.

In our families we should strive for a love that at first shelters. Babies need a lot of nurturing, humans are not like animals, where we can walk within a week of being born. We need extensive care from our parents to grow and finally become independent. This parental love nurtures, shares and protects. It is the love we need to give to young children, the vulnerable and the recovering. You can’t give a motivational speech to a baby to go and achieve their dreams. But, not everyone we deal with in life is a baby, vulnerable or recovering. Many have enough of this nurturing, protective love and need some encouragement to move forward. There comes a point in life where shelter is suffocating, and encouragement provides a path forward.

Sheltering someone even when we know they could face the harsh reality of the world is not having the best interest of the other in mind. It might not even be love at all. Many people move past these stages of needing protection, and all they need is a seed of possibility placed in their mind to go out there and live morally, nobly, daringly, admirably and adventurously.

We need to develop good ways of showing love to our parents, children, foster-parents, foster children and friends. Think of what their situation is and what it has been. Many people are not ready for life, and need to find their balance. This situation requires nurturing and protection. But there comes a day when adventure and exploration calls at the door.

These forms of love are essential in creating the environment that benefits all. Love gives, it gives protection, warmth and shelter and then motivation, structure and a path forward and upward. It is genuine and honest, hopeful and goodwilled.

So Imagine

No home has ever achieved perfect love and beauty, we understand that at RESQUED. But imagine where things could go in our home environments if we provided this warm and fulfilling family experience. It is something many children and even adults never experience. Today foster children are many times starved. But, if they do experience this love and peace once, they will never forget it. Your home could be the one where a discovery of a new way of being is painted for the first time before someone’s eyes.

Let’s commit ourselves to providing this for others, we’ve made our mistakes in this area before. We all have experienced others making mistakes in this area too. But, if we’re striving for a more loving, generous, peaceful environment, the troubles in our mind are allowed to be sorted and worked through, maybe even to a satisfying resolve and maybe even peace.